Slater's Friend

This week's topic in speech class is "My Best Friend." Slater's best friend is his chameleon Artie. I guess that happens when you've gone to 200 different high schools or whatever it is. Apparently he's the only friend he hasn't had to say goodbye to. Slater's heading to San Diego this weekend and entrusts Screech to babysit (chameleon sit?).

Jessie was supposed to help Kelly with her speech, but apparently she promised her mom she would help picket an oil company. Zack comes to Kelly's rescue and they're getting pretty close until Jessie jumps through the window and cockblocks. I guess they ran out of gas (because her mom refused to fill up out of principal! Hahahaha!)

Slater's due back from San Diego, but bad news. Artie is dead. Nice work guys. You killed Slater's best friend. Everyone feels responsible for killing him, but I'm assuming they're going to cover up the murder. It's not the lie, but the cover up that gets you in trouble. Ask Nixon.

Zack buys a brand new chameleon to fool Slater, but so did the girls! Slater doesn't believe either one of these fakes are the real Artie. Nice work Columbo.

Hazy pink dream sequence! The gang is in a criminal lineup, and the witness? Artie. Or Slater dressed up in a lizard costume. Belding is the cop and the two are handing out punishments for the murder. Screch is given a lifetime of solitary confinement. Jessie has to sit on a block of ice in a bikini. Kelly is guilty of leaving Artie under a desk lamp so she has to dance around on a frying pan. Lisa apparently killed him with dirty looks and is stuck wearing polyester? How hideous!

Slater is dealing with some serious denial here. He's searching Zack's room for Artie (and finds the awesome Kelly Kapowski cutout that Zack keeps in his room). They hand him the box and all Slater can say is "So what? It's just a dead lizard." How sad.

He starts acting out in class to cover up his deep-seeded anger at his best friend for dying on him. He's sent to Belding's office and there's some concern. This isn't the A.C. Slater we all know and love. Slater finally has a breakthrough and is able to grieve properly.

The gang gives Artie a proper funeral he deserves. Everyone shares their thoughts on the beloved lizard, and then they sing "Oh Artie Boy" to the tune of "Oh Danny Boy." If that doesn't bring tears to your eyes then you're not human. Slater realizes he has others who care about him as much as Artie did.

QUOTES:

(Editor's note) There's nothing funny about killing someone's best friend. No quotes today.

WHAT DID WE LEARN TODAY? Don't kill your friend's best friend and then cover up the murder. That's just asking for trouble.